November 2011
1 post
Good Morning
I caught a glimpse of the sunrise in your eyelashes. It played with the possibilty of happiness, then was pushed over the edge of reality and a new day was hopelessly here. Tomorrow had finally come and today slipped away silently into yesterday’s arms. I saw you cling to the frayed rope of denial for a little while longer before you opened your eyes and knew you now faced what most people...
September 2011
1 post
Now and then I think of all the times you screwed...
August 2011
6 posts
Reflection.
It’s back again. That incessant hunger. That deep, crippling longing. The loneliness. The disappointment. The fear, teetering on the brink of panic. The need to escape.
The tears don’t come. The calm scares me more than it should. The emptiness is overwhelming. I’ve never been overly emotional, but this…this is more death than life.
I just spent several minutes looking...
Tonight
I really want to fall in love.
“Even in our sleep, pain which cannot forget
falls drop by drop upon the heart...”
– Robert F. Kennedy (April 4, 1968)
July 2011
1 post
June 2011
5 posts
“We don’t know. We can only make guesses, and our guesses may be wrong. Far...”
– Madeleine L’Engle, Walking on Water (2001)
One of these days
I’m going to leave.
I don’t know for how long.
But I don’t want to stay here much longer.
May 2011
6 posts
What if
When we are asked if we are Christians, instead of saying “yes,” or “no,” we respond with a question: “Do you see the love of Christ in the way I live?”
Because really, no one should have to ask. They should know. They should be able to tell that we are not of this world, because we should be loving them as if we had nothing to lose. We should be living in the...
Something Different
For one of my classes this semester, I created an assemblage of objects that gave a glimpse into the life of a (fictional) photographer from the early 1920’s. One of the things that I did was to take an old book (in this case, The Balance Wheel by Taylor Caldwell), cut out individual words and phrases, and create my own sort of poetry. I’d like to get feedback from you. I’m not...
Sometimes
I feel that I can help everyone but myself.
“Almost anybody can learn to think or believe or know, but not a single human...”
– E. E. Cummings —“A Poet’s Advice to Students” E. E. Cummings, A Miscellany (1958)
gettingintohotwater-deactivated asked: Hello lovely. I miss you incredibly much. I want to have a photoshoot and then sit in bed all morning watching movies and eat Cinnamon Toast Crunch with you.
April 2011
5 posts
Zoë Keating.
I am addicted.
Journal Entry.
I am weak. I want to give up and stop fighting, because I’m tired. I’m tired of everything being so hard. I’m not where I belong, mentally, emotionally. But that’s no excuse. I need to stop making excuses. I’ve lost all respect for myself. For my body and my mind. I can’t finish my work—I’m worthless. I can’t stay in shape—I’m...
March 2011
11 posts
Just a Thought
Why do we so often wait until people die to tell them what they have meant to us and how they have changed our lives? Are we so afraid of being judged that we wait until they cannot reply to tell them what we think?
Wouldn’t it be better to tell them while they can still hear it?
Confession:
I don’t care for the so-called ‘Fine Arts’.
I would rather make someone smile with a piece of ‘bad’ art than create a piece of ‘great’ art that the everyday person does not understand.
Does that make me less of an artist?
Third cup of coffee this morning.
I ran this morning. I didn’t go as far as I wanted. That’s okay. I ran. Now I’m drinking coffee, listening to music and wondering what I’m going to do today. It’s one of those days where I want to drive, drive to the end of the earth and go a little farther. I can’t do that, though, not yet. So maybe I’ll write, maybe I’ll create, maybe I’ll...
Anonymous asked: I can't get you off my mind. A love so selfless, so whole, and so...mutual.
I can't help but to question it's reality.
Is it real?
I can't help but to question it's reality.
Is it real?
Nothing.
The pen is on paper, poised and ready.
Crumpled sheets of paper surround me.
And I’m blank; completely blank.
I just want to draw again.
February 2011
33 posts
Lesson to be learned:
Give myself grace.
…I kept telling him how woefully I had failed someone I loved, failed totally, otherwise the person couldn’t have done the wrong that was so destructive. Finally he looked at me and said calmly, “Who are you to think you are better than our Lord? After all, he was singularly unsuccessful with a great many people.” That remark, made to me many years...
It is just after one in the morning.
I am so tired of fighting.
I try too hard.
I don’t know what I’m doing.
Where is my faith?
A glance in the mirror
led to a simple, sudden thought flitting across my mind.
I am beautiful.
With my mussed up hair, without a trace of makeup. With my tired blue eyes, without a shirt hiding my imperfect body. With my growing confidence, without a sense of crippling shame.
I am beautiful.
Maybe not to the world’s standards, But why would I want to live by the standards of something that sells sex, drugs,...
Anonymous asked: Where does it all come from?
“I’m gonna be honest,
Its not often that I find myself eager, to write...”
– Rudy Francisco (If I were a Love Poet)
My mind
is a prison cell.
And all I want to do is escape.
